Joan Grey graduated from West Point in the first class with women and was commissioned in the Army in May 1980. She served in the US and Germany as a platoon leader, commander, and staff officer until injuries from a parachute accident led to a medical discharge. The accident ended her military career but opened her eyes to hospital chaplaincy. She completed chaplaincy training and served at Wake Medical Center in NC, Tampa General Hospital and Moffitt Cancer Center in FL. During her husband's military service, frequent moves resulted in an eclectic career path including additional employment as an environmental educator, fundraiser, facilitator, and numerous volunteer positions to include time as a hospice volunteer. In addition to an undergraduate degree from West Point, she has graduate degrees from San Jose State and Harvard.

Good Goodbyes: A Mortal's Guide to Life distills research from her thesis: Awakening to Mortality: End-of-Life as Rite of Passage and Pathway to Transformation, which fulfilled requirements for a Master's in Religion from Harvard. A September 2021 diagnosis of pancreatic cancer has provided an opportunity to test and validate the premise of Good Goodbyes - preparation before expiration makes it possible to live fully and consciously all the way until the end.